Fear of Dying ...

On "Fear of Dying", Jiddu Krishnamurty (My favourite writer) says:

Most of us are frightened of dying because we don't know what it means to live. We don't know how to live, therefore we don't know how to die. As long as we are frightened of life we shall be frightened of death. The man who is not frightened of life is not frightened of being completely insecure for he understands that inwardly, psychologically, there is no security. When there is no security there is an endless movement and then life and death are the same. The man who lives without conflict, who lives with beauty and love, is not frightened of death because to love is to die.

Happiness ...

Happiness always looks small when you hold it in your hands
But when you learn to share it
you will realize how big and precious it is!!

Beautiful pictures are developed by negatives in a dark room.
So if u see darkness in your life assume that
God is making a beautiful picture for you
And for that you need to smile
ALWAYS ...

Never make someone your priority when ...

The other day, my friend (Ravisankar Deekshitula) was browsing through all his friend list in GTalk, and I found a nice line on the status of one of his friend. (Thanks Ravi for this). It read as ...

Never make someone your priority when you are just an option for them!

So simple that line was, and it forced me to think a lot on that; really touched to the core. I was thinking, sometimes, we tend to not define our priorities correctly and face problems out of that. Well, this is an art to be learned.

Some more lines go in the same thinking:

• Never cry for one who makes you cry.
• What cares does not matter and what matters does not care.
• Never cry for any relation in life, because for the one whom you cry does not deserve your tears and the one who deserves will never let you cry...

All this is the fickleness of human mind and its thinking. We are always running behind things we can't get or have… at the cost of things we have with us (and conveniently assume will be there with us forever)

If you think this as a problem, then my solution to this is "Never take someone for granted". So, all those who suffer from this syndrome, wake up and realise; before it's too late ...

Busy Life !!!

You might have seen hundreds or more of questions floating here and there; getting some places in mail boxes, "How is life ?". Then, following that, lot of answers or replies "Life is as usual... Same busy life... just going on ... " .. Lots in similar lines... Out of these many answers, my eyes see the word "Busy" and it looks to me as "B U S Y..."

So, here I am today, to express my feelings on that word "BUSY"...

To start with, who can be called as really busy and who is not busy, but pretending to be busy ? Lot of questions to be answered ... Stay tuned!

The other day, I was going to Bangalore and I was in Chennai railway station... One of my junior was with me... and he told there, "I feel whole world is travelling when I am in railway station, and I feel whole world is sick when I am in some hospital, and I feel whole world is enjoying when I am in some movie theatre". I started thinking on those lines for long; though; the first impression was "It's really correct. If that is not the case, then why I can see only people around me doing the same thing as I am doing or standing in the same place, where I am standing." So my thinking went on ... And I thought, may be this is the reason, the word came as "Busy" ...

Yet another day (was a week-end), I was in Marina Beach with my family members, and my uncle told, people are finding little time from their busy life to relax here. Some people were seen playing with their kids, some flying kites and some jumping in the sea water... And I told, don't you think that they are busy in what they are doing now? Agreed and with convincing face, he told, you are right. Now, I say, if that is the case, then whatever, you do, you keep yourself busy there; thereby getting 100% of your expectation from that. Whatever, I do, I say I am busy in doing that...

So, finally, the word "Busy" became so general, that I don't see anything or any work, that I can do without keeping myself busy. Now, when I am not really doing anything, can I say, "I am busy doing nothing ?" Funny...right? It's like, holding air in your hand :).

Well, I have given some lines to think on ... Now, be judges and find, who can be called real busy; or pretending to be busy; or there is nothing called real busy or false busy ! All the very best for the finding ...

Friendship - a relation ...

A friendship is a relationship. We must remember to honor and respect each other within all our relationships, through forthrightness, honesty, clear communication and trust!

Friendships don’t just happen. They require attention, nurturing, love and energy to create them and keep them alive. Friendships require our time. The time to talk and share our thoughts and feelings, to enjoy a meal together, to just be alone together as well as interacting with larger circles of friends with each other. As friends, there are good times of celebrating and enjoying life together. During the bad times like when you are sick, depressed or grieving the loss of a loved one, friends spend some time to give you company and cheer you up.

Friends remember to reciprocate energy into the relationship. To make a genuine friendship/relationship, both people involved do the inviting and calling up as well as "doing" for each other with loving actions and words naturally of their own accord. Within good healthy relationships, we find that we are seen at our highest potential by our loved ones and all the good we are as well as being loved with our flaws.

Our friends and relations provide us with a Magic Mirror of what we must heal and look at within ourselves. It gives us the gift and the opportunity to observe ourselves and make improvements in our thoughts, words and actions. When we are really serving the Higher Purpose, it provides the gift and opportunity, not only for the challenges being presented with a friend or a circle of friends, but also for anyone who might be observing what is going on within our lives or within the lives of whom we are interacting.

We are constantly being presented with a venue to heal the various issues from our past, whether it is from this life or another. Circumstances provide Mirrors of the self. We can only look within and remember that when we are pointing a finger at someone else, in thoughts or verbally, there are three pointing back!

Strong bonds of friendship develop over time, sometimes many years, undergoing and withstanding strong shocks of adversity. Most misunderstandings or conflicts really stem from unmet expectations. When we have no expectations we can have a lot more happiness in our lives and we all can be free to be who we truly are. With honest communication, love and compassion, the friendship has the potential to grow stronger and deeper through any hardship or discord.

True friends are able to forgive and have compassion and love without judgment. We can easily be who we truly are without feeling that we must walk on eggshells or turn down the wattage on our brilliance! Instead we feel encouraged to shine our Light brightly and therefore, live life truly and deeply. No one else can lessen the brilliance of another. We are all responsible for our own Light and how we use it on the Planet in accordance with the Divine Plan. In a healthy relationship we feel the connection and genuine support of each other. A sincere friend can easily look at the bigger picture. No matter how the other has acted or what he or she has said or done, it comes back to our own unmet expectations. When we are clear within ourselves about our needs and wants, then our friendships are perfectly balanced. Don’t take anything personally and do not assume anything, be impeccable with your words and always do your best.

I realize it is much more important that I am the good genuine friend and all else falls into place from that basis. I help my friends to the level I can and lastly, I don't want to be problem for anybody in anyway; especially for my friends.

Am I Your Friend ???

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you have to think before you speak to me!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
my presence ever makes you feel uncomfortable!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you have to thank me for everything i do for you!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you have to say sorry for everything that you don't do!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you have to ask me for favors!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you think i would not be curious to know your new philosophy of life!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you go by what i say and do not understand what i don't say!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you think that listening to your dreams would put me to sleep!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you think that seeing you in pain, would not bring a tear to me!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you think I do not remember the first time we met!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you don't see the thousand ways I try to make you happy!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you don't realise how your smile brightens up my day!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you would rather keep quiet when you really wanna talk!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you hesitate to ask me to stay back when you think we should be together!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
you take too much time to tell me what i mean to you!

Am I Your FRIEND ?

Keep Smiling ...

If at times you feel you want to cry

And life seems such a trial
Above the clouds theres a bright blue sky
So make your tears a smile.

As you travel on lifes way
With its many ups and downs
Remember its quite true to say
One smile is worth a dozen frowns.

Among the worlds expensive things
A smile is very cheap
And when you give a smile away,
You get one back to keep.


Happiness comes at times to all
But sadness comes unbidden
And sometimes a few tears must fall
Among the laughter hidden.

So when friends have sadness on their face
And troubles round them piled
The world will seem a better place
And all because you smiled.

Keep Smiling ...

Life is not all about Winning ...

The art of "Forgetting" ...

Problems do come to everybody and I am not an exception to that ... Now, there could be many ways to resolve them. Something bad happened to me and I am remembering all these stuff to give more fire on that ... I know, I am doing wrong ... Well said by someone, "An idle brain is the devil’s workshop" ... So, I got to forget these things ... And, I am in the voyage of that ...

Forgetting is the key. While one does not entirely forget, the action is simply dissolved into the formlessness - the sea of forgetfulness - along with other memories, which emerge as and when needed. On the one hand, I am the source of every obstacle; while on the other hand, I am the solution to every problem.

Now, the question is "How do I practise the art of forgetting?". And the simple and great answer to this is "Stay in present ...". So, I fill every moment with 100% of my presence.

If I am working, I am focused 100%.
If I am in silence, I am in silence 100%.
If I am deep in thought, I am thinking 100%.
If am writing, I am 100% focused on what I am writing about.

I move from action to action, moment to moment; forgetting the last moment and delving into the new moment. Some actions last for 1 moment while others last a thousand moments, it all depends. When I am fully in the moment doing whatever brings me joy, there is no room to fret and create chaos that would make me sick or anxious or whatever.

The other day, I was bit anxious of something, that made me little sad too; then, I asked myself, "Hey, What is going on? Where are you ? What are you thinking about ?" Can't you forget this ?? My Inner Voice reminded me "When you are not fully present, you experience a sense of lack. When you are fully present, there is no room for lack. As the outer and inner are one, the fullness of who you are is created in the outer. There is therefore no need to worry about a thing as you know that all is well..." And here, I am again, on the same journey with all my courage taking the first step...

For me, being in the present, experiencing all that I am in every moment, is my way of forgetting... And, that is "The Solution" to most of my problems ...

Men Are From Mars; Women Are From Venus ...

Excerpt from the famous book "Men Are From Mars; Women Are From Venus" by John Gray.

He explains the life of "Love" as ...

Falling in love is always magical. It feels eternal, as if love will last forever. We naively believe that somehow we are exempt from the problems our parents had, free from the odds that love will die, assured that it is meant to be and that we are destined to live happily ever after. But as the magic recedes and daily life takes over, it emerges that men continue to expect women to think and react like men, and women expect men to feel and behave like women. Without a clear awareness of our differences, we do not take the time to understand and respect each other. We become demanding, resentful, judgmental, and intolerant.

With the best and most loving intentions love continues to die. Somehow the problems creep in. The resentments build. Communication breaks down. Mistrust increases. Rejection and repression result. The magic of love is lost...

Now he explains the "Why, How" part of the problem:

Imagine that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. One day long ago the Martians, looking through their telescopes, discovered the Venusians. Just glimpsing the Venusians awakened feelings they had never known. They fell in love and quickly invented space travel and flew to Venus.

The Venusians welcomed the Martians with open arms. They had intuitively known that this day would come. Their hearts opened wide to a love they had never felt before.

The love between the Venusians and Martians was magical. They delighted in being together, doing things together, and sharing together. Though from different worlds, they reveled in their differences. They spent months learning about each other, exploring and appreciating their different needs, preferences, and behavior patterns. For years they lived together in love and harmony.

Then they decided to fly to Earth. In the beginning everything was wonderful and beautiful. But the effects of Earth's atmosphere took hold, and one morning everyone woke up with a peculiar kind of amnesia!

Both the Martians and Venusians forgot that they were from different planets and were supposed to be different. In one morning everything they had learned about their differences was erased from their memory. And since that day men and women have been in conflict.

Now he explains the solution ...

Through understanding the hidden differences of the opposite sex we can more successfully give and receive the love that is in our hearts. By validating and accepting our differences, creative solutions can be discovered whereby we can succeed in getting what we want. And, more important, we can learn how to best love and support the people we care about. Love is magical, and it can last, if we remember our differences ...

Happy Birthday ...

The day was 19th May 1982, and I came into this earth. Since then,many 19th May's have gone. Different phases of my life with different such incidences of the same day... Today is one more such day...goes by the name "Birthday".

So,today is my Birthday. A day of celebration ... A day where all wish you a "Happy Birthday" ... A day where you party ... A day which goes cheerfully and pompously ...

But, I see another view of this (mostly, only this)...

I have climbed up one more step, nearing to my target. I really don't know what is the target and in which step, I am going to get that; but, whatever these may be, the fact is that I have neared by one step. So,I have to be alert! And, I am focused, I know I have to struggle. Then,this is not new to me either; I am already on the 25th step now. I have struggled a lot to reach here. I have to continue this journey, struggle in the path; may be little harder than the past. But,I can do that... I am ready to take that challenge. I have faith on me, I believe myself, above all, I love myself. I CAN and I WILL ...

Finally, Wish me "Happy Birthday" and Wish me "All the best" for my future ...

Yours Truly ... Chinmaya.
19th May 2007.

Mother ...

Mother ... A word that probably is the first word we learn... A magic that we feel for the first time in our lives... First Love and what not... No words for her...

• God sees us through our Mothers' eyes and rewards us for our virtues.
• To a child's ear, "mother" is magic in any language.
• Life began with waking up and loving my mother's face.
• Mother is the name of God in the lips and hearts of children.
• A mother is she who can take the place of all others.
• A mother's love is instinctual, unconditional, and forever.
• Mother is the bank where we deposit all our hurts and worries.
• No influence is so powerful as that of the mother.
• The strength of motherhood is greater than natural laws.
• Mothers are instinctive philosophers.
• She's my teacher, adviser, and greatest inspiration.
• A good mother is worth hundreds of schoolmasters.
• A mother loves her children even when they least deserve to be loved.
  
• Mother is the one we count on for the things that matter most of all.
  
• A mother understands what a child does not say.
• Mother is the home we come from. She is nature, soil, ocean.
• A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary.
• Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible.
• God could not be everywhere and therefore He made mothers.
• The mother's heart is the child's schoolroom.

A Mother's love is something that no one can explain ... It is made of deep devotion and of sacrifice and pain ... It is endless and unselfish ... Nothing can destroy it or take that love away ... It is patient and forgiving when all others are forsaking, and it never fails or falters even though the heart is breaking ... It believes beyond believing when the world around condemns, and it glows with all the beauty of the rarest, brightest gems ... It is far beyond defining, it defies all explanation, And it still remains a secret like the mysteries of creation ... A many splendoured miracle man cannot understand and another wondrous evidence of God's tender guiding hand...

God made a wonderful mother,
A mother who never grows old;
He made her smile of the sunshine,
And He moulded her heart of pure gold;
In her eyes He placed bright shining stars,
In her cheeks fair roses you see;
God made a wonderful mother,
And He gave that dear mother to me.


I Love you Maa....

Friend for Life ...

Memories of one old friend ...

I was having my dinner last night and suddenly got a SMS from one of my friend. It carried the phone number of one of my oldest friend. My joys had no bounds...thought of calling him after my dinner as I wanted a resting time to start chat with him... That forced me to have a quick dinner ...

Just a background of him and our friendship....
We were friends when we were in 6th and 7th standard. His name is "Sujeet Rath". Golden were those days; being with friends; I never thought of anything else as part of my little world other than those friends and my home. Sujeet, a great friend of mine; we used to sit together in class; used to play together; used to go to same tuition ... Well, we had a quarrel once , I remember, when he had put his hands on my shoulders and I was somehow against of that..I never liked that ...Then the great effort of our tuition teacher to settle the matter ... and as usual..again we became friends.....

So there I was dialing that number and it rang. It was answered and the conversation went like this:

sr: Hello ...
me: May I speak to Sujeet, please ....
sr: Yes, speaking ...Who's this ?
me: One old friend of yours ....
sr: When...
me: When we were in 7th Standard ...
sr: What is the name... (Felt too curious .....)
me: (So, no more playing around..., I just opened the suspense...) Chinmaya
sr: Chinmaya Achary, you mean
me: Yes, Chinu here
sr: Really...I can not believe .... From where did you get my number ?
me: From Sarat ....
sr: Oh... It feels so great to get you back.. I always think of you ....Where are you these days ?
me: I am in Chennai.
sr: What you are doing ?
me: So called ... "Software Engineer"....
sr: Well, you were out of sight for so many years ....I looked for so many years ... but did not get your address...
me: Yes, I went to my uncle's place to continue my studies ... and thereby, unlinking all the previous links...
sr: Yes, its been 14 years, we are talking again.... You are sounding totally different.. I want to see you...Please send me your photo...I am telling my address... note it down... please send within a week... (He was kinda restless...)
me: OK, now I am outside.. Let me go to house first, then I can write your address down.
sr: How are all at home ? Where are they ...??
me: Father left us 3 yrs back. All sisters' got married. Now, me, brother and mother staying here in Chennai together..
sr: Sorry... I am...
me: It's OK. You tell, how are all at home ?
sr: Yes, all are doing good. Elder sister got married. Others have done degrees in Computers and I am in RK Hotel....
me: Where is didi now ?
sr: Bhubaneswar....
me: What else ??
sr: Stop now.... It's been long u r talking.... My sister is telling, your phone bill might be running high....
(I think, he had put his phone on speaker... All his family were listening our conversation.. They were happy as he was)
me: Its OK yaar... Its after long, I am talking and I have just reached home...Let me open the door....then I can write the address
sr: Ok...
me: Ok, now you can tell...
sr: (..Address...)
me: (...Writing...) Oh.. the same address... I remember....
sr: Yes, the same house ..the same place... you only left us ...
me: Is aunty (his mother) there... Can I speak to her...
sr: Yes.. Sure .. (Maa.... Chinu wants to speak to you.. Come fast... He is online)
aunty: Hello...Chinu
me: Namaste aunty... How are you ?
aunty: I am fine beta ... How are you ? I feel so good to hear you after 14 years ...Sujeet and all are really thrilled ...
me: Same here Aunty.....
....
me: Please give to Sujeet...
aunty: (Take... He wants to speak to you...)
sr: Yes, Chinu... Now stop... It's too long we are talking... I will save this number... And do not forget to send your photo and your address too.....
me: Ok, then, I will stop here.... It was great to have you back after so so long time...
sr: Yes... ok..bye...
me: bye... Good night

Well, the conversation stopped...But my whole night, passed in his memory ... my past... my school days...I remembered the exchange of flower plants we were doing those days... He used to come to my house and I used to go to his house ... The days were really golden ... I can never forget these ....

See, it feels really great to get a old friend back in your network ... Really, Friendship never dies... I was uttering the line as I was trying to sleep last night .... "Friends are the siblings, God forgot to give us." ...

One night with "Bheja Fry" ...

The date was 30th April, 2007 and I was in Bangalore. As planned, I had to watch a movie with my friends, and fortunately, it was the only hindi movie available that time, that I had not watched, went by the name "Bheja Fry". The theatre was PVR cinemas in The Forum.

Well, we 4, got ready with tickets (Oops!!! I forgot, I have to transfer money to my Credit card now). I was told, it was a pure vegeterian comedy movie and there I was to see how it goes in PVR with all the modern audience!

As rightly said, it was a comedy movie without so called double-meaning sentences (/words) or slapstick strokes often cracked by David Dhawan or Priyadarshan movies. Well, the meaning of the movie title in english is "Racking Brains" (Hmm...Sounds non-veg from the title, right?). Neither did it rack our brains but stung stomachs with the hysterical laughter pangs induced throughout its runtime.

Let me put some light on the movie story and characters ...

The main ingredient in this Bheja Fry is an idiot who is the hero of the film. And the idea to have an idiot as the hero isn't idiotic at all. The idiot here isn't really dumb but is least conscious or bothered about the world around and doesn't realize that people are laughing on his expense. If you just ponder, you will come across so many idiots like these in real life. Vinay Pathak plays one such idiot with utmost conviction.

Bheja Fry is a story of a group of affluent high society men who organize talent dinners every Friday night. Talent dinner is a dinner where all these riches get in one such idiot of their own, who unassumingly displays his stupid talent and the group is entertained on his expense. The one who gets the most entertaining idiot wins. Ranjeet Thadani (Rajat Kapoor), a music company owner is in hunt of one such 'bakra' for his talent dinner. And then he stumbles upon Bharat Bhushan (Vinay Pathak) whom he invites home. Mr. Bharat Bhushan who considers himself as a singer looks forward to this dinner. Ranjeet wife's Sheetal (Sarika) detests her husband's nasty ways of deriving fun and leaves the house out of annoyance on the dinner day. Further things go wrong when Bhushan lands up in the house followed by a lot of unexpected guests including Sheetal's ex-boyfriend (Milind Soman), Ranjeet's girlfriend (Bhairavi Goswami) and an income tax-officer (Ranvir Shorey).

Without any second thoughts, Bheja Fry belongs whole-heartedly to Vinay Pathak. His look, mannerisms, vocabulary, dialogue delivery, laughing style and many other such minute detailing add utmost level of authenticity to his character. Not just his comic timing is flawless, so is his spontaneity. And unlike other comic actors of recent times who make you laugh by poking fun of others, Vinay makes you laugh at his character's expense. I can not forget the dialogues that were coming out of him (How can I when whole audience was repeating the words with him in the theatre ?).

Amazing style of locking his suitcase, which contained only his so-called certificates as a proof of his singing talent; each time uttering the word "It's Ringing" after dialing a number; and uttering the word "Redial" after calling a person 2nd time pressing the RD button in the phone system; and his wonderful shortcut "TGIF" that he explained as "Thank God, It's Friday"...

Well, after watching a good movie (which lasted for 1:40 hrs max), we headed for dinner. The hotel we chose was "A Taste Of Rampur", 24, 1st Floor, 5th Block , Koramangala Industrial Layout. With the hang-ups of the movie discussions and dialogues, the dinner session and then, rest of the night passed ...

Love "Learning" ...

Wikipedia defines the term "Learning" as:

"Learning is the acquisition and development of memories and behaviors, including skills, knowledge, understanding, values, and wisdom. It is the goal of education, and the product of experience."

So, it is a process of acquiring knowledge and using it. For most of us, in the first some years of our lives, at least, we might not have taken that word as seriously as we do now. Mainly in school days, we learned, got good positions in schools; but, I guess, those were merely to hold the expectation of our lovely parents or for the panic of being punished by our teachers. Well, the point is, we never understood the practical application of the word "Learning". But, this is a continuous process, resulting in amazing discoveries and startling ideas; supported existence and accomplishment; ultimately, connecting us to life!. More of learning arise from experience and we get experience from learning. We are still learning and have to learn a lot as "Life is a great teacher".

Being said that, now the question is "Why is that important to learn continuously ?" Change is the only constant. When things change, we need to adapt to the changing circumstances to survive and grow. And, to adapt to changing circumstances, we need to learn! Since "change" is inevitable, there is no point of talking "not learning". Henry Ford said, "Anyone who stops learning is old, whether twenty or eighty. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young".

Learning can be broadly divided into 2 categories: Informal and Formal. Informal learning is learning things in our day-to-day situations (if we don't look in front of us while walking, we learn that we run into things and that might be dangerous). It's what daily life practices teach us. It is learning from life, during a meal at table with parents, Play (activity), exploring. Formal learning is learning that takes place within a teacher-student relationship, such as in a school system. Now, there could be combined approaches that uses both the formal and informal ways.

Now, the question is, given a lot of things to learn, What should I learn and How? The simplest answer to this is "Learn your passion". If you have discovered your passion, you are on the way of learning. We go, wherever our passion leads. To ensure that we learn continuously, we need to be involved in obvious activities like reading, interaction, reflection and documentation. Getting food for thought is now an easy task with high-quality books, the Internet and search engines like Google, Wikipedia. Interaction & networking are now inescapable if we want to gain knowledge. Interaction also has the potential to shake us out of our shells and follow new thoughts and ideas provided we have the attitude - that of letting in opposing views and innovative ideas and being open to voices that challenge. Teaching is considered as one of the best ways to learn as it exposes one to innumerable questions and compels us to be extremely sure of what we know. Finally, reflection, introspection and documentation help us learn. They help us draw upon our intuition and creative abilities, question ourselves, and analyze/consolidate our thoughts. After all, answers also come from within our mental and spiritual resources. Keeping a book of ideas & thoughts, writing and blogging are great ways to call upon these resources.

Benjamin Franklin has truly said "Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn." ...

7 Habits ...

"The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" is a famous book by Stephen R. Covey. It has sold over 15 million copies in thirty-eight languages since first publication in 1989, which was marked by the release of a 15th anniversary edition in 2004. The book lists seven principles that, if established as habits, are supposed to help a person achieve true interdependent "effectiveness".

Indeed, a great book. I am just summarizing those 7 habits here ...

The first three habits can be summarized in a single expression: Make and keep Promises.
Habit 1: Ability to make a promise
Habit 2: Content of the Promise
Habit 3: Keeping the Promise

The next three complementary-team Habits can be summarized in a short phrase: Involve people in the problem and work out the solution together.
Habit 4: Mutual respect
Habit 5: Mutual understanding
Habit 6: Creative cooperation

And
Habit 7: Increasing your competency in the 4 areas of life: body, mind, heart and spirit.

Here go all the 7 ...

1. Be Proactive
Being Proactive is more than taking initiative. It is recognizing that we are responsible for our own choices and have the freedom to choose based on the principles and values rather than on moods or conditions. Proactive people are agents of change and choose not to be victims, to be reactive, or to blame others.

2. Begin with the End in the Mind
Individuals, families, teams and organizations shape their own future by first creating a mental vision for any project, large or small, personal or interpersonal. They don’t just live day-to-day with no clear purpose in mind. They identify and commit themselves to the principles, relationships and purposes that matter most to them.

3. Put First Things First
Putting first things first means organizing and executing around your most important priorities. Whatever the circumstances, it is living and being driven by the urgent agendas and forces surrounding you.

4. Think Win-Win
Thinking win-win is a frame of mind and heart that seeks mutual benefit and mutual respect in all interactions. It’s thinking in terms of abundance and opportunity rather than scarcity and adversarial competition. It’s not thinking selfishly (win-lose) or like a martyr (lose-win). It’s thinking in terms of “we”, not “me”.

5. Seek first to Understand, Then To Be Understood
When we listen with the intent to understand others, rather than with the intent to reply, we begin true communication and relationship building. Opportunities to then speak openly and to be understood come much more naturally and easily. Seeking to understand takes consideration; seeking to be understood takes courage. Effectiveness lies in balancing or blending the two.

6. Synergize
Synergy is the third alternative-not my way, not your way, but a third way that is better than either of us would come up with individually. It’s the fruit of respecting, valuing, and even celebrating one another’s differences. It’s about solving problems, seizing opportunities, and working out differences. It’s the kind of creative cooperation of 1+1 = 3, 11, 111 … or more. Synergy is also the key to any effective team or relationship. A synergistic team is a complementary team-where the team is organized so that the strengths of some compensate for the weakness of others. In this way you optimize and run with strengths and make individual weaknesses irrelevant.

7. Sharpen The Saw
Sharpening the saw is about constantly renewing ourselves in the four basic areas of life: physical, social/emotional, mental and spiritual. It’s the habit that increases our capacity to live all other habits of effectiveness.

Orkutting ...

"ORKUT" - Everybody knows of it. I see lot of young people being member of this network. The popularity of ORKUT is growing by leaps and bounds !!! It was just 1 year back, when I started accessing Orkut (Orkutting); then I was thinking it was some kind of spam killing time.... Then I registered onto Orkut after repeated requestes from my friends, who had become quite a fan of Orkut by then. Well, the requests were sentimental, that dragged me to this ocean....

Few months back, I got a mail, where I discovered that ORKUT BUYUKKOTEN is the guy who started this site/software to find his lost girl-friend. And he is paid hefty sum by Google (Owning ORKUT site now) for the things we do like scrapping. He is expected to be the richest person by 2009. This Software made a whopping 1 billion dollars profit in its first year, which we today know as ORKUT.

As far as using Orkut goes, simple... Send a request to your friends; they will be there in your friend list, once they accept it. Lots of logic went then: Put your photo so that a old to old friend can see you and try guessing you as his/her friend; Write your name so that an old friend can search by your name (If he/she remembers) and add you. By that, you will be in touch with them. It becomes an addiction, before you know of it or realize so !!!

Same thing happened to me too. Wow, it felt good to see the friend count and fan count increasing day by day. Thought, Wow, I have these many fans and these many friends. Thanks to Orkut, by that, I got some of my old friends back, which I would not have otherwise. I became a victim to this too.. all became well being able to stay touched with long lost friends...And finding out what's going on in their lives… These days, there is hardly anyone who is not connected through orkut… so its all well intended !!!

But everything comes with its disadvantages … cann't help it much…So as ORKUT ...

Slowly it is becoming nuisance .. Getting friend requests from "Anonymous" users who want “to become friendship” with you, can get as irritating as anything else! Over and beyond that, when all start scrapping you to say “hi” and “how are you? Can I know you!”, you really dont want any of that. Some of the scrap books became "dating site" !!! It became quite an effort to search for genuine scraps from friends from a sea of “Hi How are you?", "Wanna friendship with you”, “Waz up there?”, “Helllo how r u ?" !!!

Orkut became a nuisance and is misused to quite an extent. It is no longer meant for communicating with friends, but creating fake profiles of others and causing them trouble. Few months before, it even came to public notice and police took some action on the victims. The Cyber Crime Cell has urged Google to block the links of its popular community portal, Orkut, to India. The action was a result of the derogatory profiles of Chhatrapati Shivaji and Bal Thackeray put up at the site by mischief mongers.

Well, things seem to be improving these days .. Orkut is adding some more features to prevent mis-use of this. Only time can tell, how far it is true and How we can take benefit of this .....