Happiness & Outlook ...

Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life.

Above line was my Orkut fortune the other day. I kept thinking on that line, rather on two words, Happiness and Outlook... Happy... The easiest word to say. Everybody says "Be happy, don't worry". But the question goes in mind "Why can't I be happy?". It is true for all. Fundamentally, we have problem in searching for the happiness. We rely on "if only's" - that if only we had a good job, a big house, a nice car, and lots of love, then (and maybe only then) we would be happy. We learn to compare ourselves to our friends, neighbours, even relative strangers, all of those people who seem to have "more" and therefore are better and "happier" than we are. So we think, people who achieve their goals and who have nice cars, big houses and good loving relationshis are happy. We relate directly our happiness to outside events, achievements, possessions, and other external factors. But, it is not true always as it looks to be...

While a number of external factors do play roles in the human condition, such as economic conditions, environmental stressors, and physical health, the big piece of the puzzle that seems to pull it all together is "outlook." Some people love to do something, while many just hate those. People take utmost happiness from some work/place while others do not like those work/place. Things happen and people react. But outlook affects their reactions. These feelings and reactions are largely caused by the outlook and attitude of those involved.

"Things" such as external events certainly play an important role in triggering our emotional reactions. But since we may have little control over these outside events, why not learn to control what we can - our outlook and thinking?

So, happiness is not as elusive as we think. Things may play a role, but do not control our happiness or how we feel. It is often blocked by "stinking thinking" that results in feelings of depression, anxiety, panic, anger, and low frustration tolerance. We may be powerless over other people, places, and things, but powerful when it comes to our thinking, feeling, and behaviour. Happiness really is an inside job and closely tied to our outlook on life. Is getting rid of irrational thinking that blocks greater happiness simple? Maybe. Is it easy? No way! Habits, including habits of "stinking thinking," take time to develop, and it takes time to change bad habits to good habits of healthy, rational thinking. It takes work and practice, and then more practice, practice, and practice. But, we can do it! After all, good thinking really does get good results!